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- I
think Our Americans fellows who share with us here should know by
now that we are not what their media is feeding them. We
don’t hate Americans or westerns, yet, we do respect them
for their contribution to the knowledge and science. I think
American members changed their view about Arabs and witnessed that
Arab males and females are well educated people. I hope they
deliver this image to others about Arabs.
-Teachers need to allow students to breathe and
grow on their own freewill. Knowledge can flow both
ways, we can all learn from each other. When that
circulation is interrupted, that task of writing becomes a very
daunting one and learning becomes a means to achieve the grade.
Once that cycle is broken, there is more opportunity to enjoy
learning and be more comfortable with sharing ideas through
writing.
--
OWCp also created a place for Arabic
males and females to share, read and discuss various topics that
can not be tackled in real life for its sensitivity.
----
Having
peers from different countries motivates me to share my culture
and religion. It is nice to introduce such topics in one writings.
And in the same time I feel that I am forever waiting for them to
share the same, because it is really nice to read others
perspectives on life, especially when those others are from places
different from yours.
---students
in OWCp do heir best to represent themselves and their cultures
through creating positive dialogues with people from other
cultures for the sake of creating more global understanding and
enlightening them of their role as peace makers.
--We
Saudis, don’t have the chance to interact with native speakers of
English, it is because our culture, and then for us women social
and religious boundaries make it almost impossible. So using the
Internet a lot of problems are solved, and we can practice our
English and interact in the best ways ever. For sure we have to
use the Internet to the highest extent when it gets to learning.
--I
start reading many topics written by native speakers along with
their everyday life. This has helped me to understand the American
culture. The cultural differences can be eliminated through more
interaction and opening the gates to more understanding about the
others on this way we can make Americans and others to understand
us through frequented interaction
--
- I
think such conflicts usually happen among friends. At the end I’m
sure they both understand that these are just words express
an individual opinion. However, I think being moderate and
understanding would help solve any problem of this kind.
- By sharing
information with other people (members) from different cultures
around the globe, we became more interested to find out more about
our culture to be ready to share it with out any mistakes that'd
make us look like ignorant!
- I think it's
increased by gathering Arabs and Americans in one place (the
forum). So they became closer and had their own chitchats about
their daily lives and traditions which gave them awareness of each
other's culture.
- I think any one who
knows better would believe that every person has his own beliefs
but that does not mean his people have the same beliefs.
- I’ve noticed that most of the students tend to focus on
sharing internet resources and articles rather than writing their
own viewpoints explicitly with respect to sharing religion. The
information is presented but not discussed all that much, as there
are numerous posts that are excellent cultural topics; however
there is no or little response. At times students I’ve read are a
bit defensive. In some cases, I don’t think there is awareness or
consciousness that while some things may be universals and
similarities may be apparent, these specific concepts do differ
from culture to culture and that needs to be discussed openly.
Otherwise there will be a lack of understanding; however, this
will be overlooked. Personal views and understandings are quite
possibly the best view to read, and certainly is the most
interesting to learn from.
-With cultural topics, sometimes it is necessary to share personal
stories and occurrences and I am not sure how open some students
would be to disclosing that much information. That may be
cultural. All I know am I really enjoyed reading topics that are
about real stories, and reflect personal knowledge and viewpoints
rather than only borrowed informative articles.
- I think for the most part the students make very good
attempts to cover answering questions. Although in some ways I
feel a bit of the writing reflects class assignments rather than
personal choice. This proves to be unfortunate for all. Writing
should be a truthful reflection of one’s own thoughts opinions,
ideas… a creative way of expressing oneself to the rest of the
world. When restrictions are placed on that who knows where the
ideas are coming from and it makes self discovery a more difficult
task as where is self in such writing?
- It is possible especially if the students have spent some
time traveling there. To fully understand the cultural norms
presented, some argue that one should directly experience the
culture; however, I don’t think that is the case all the time.
The internet certainly does offer a reasonable alternative to
actually going there when you aren’t able to. Plus, there are
many things that are universals and through that there is a basic
understanding. But to understand something specifically for what
it is and in a context, I think through discussion and sharing
stories further understanding could be achieved.
-Although I noticed that cultural topics presented by Americans
were not all that actively responded to, but observed that they
were read. There seems to be an interest there, however there
is a bit of shyness towards a direct participation at the site. I
know I learn so much from reading the cultural topics presented by
students in the Arab world, so I assume the students are learning
from the American’s topics. With learning these different
concepts, eventually there is bound to be understanding.
--Here
is the senario: A group of American and international friends met
in a restaurant. One of our international friends initiated a
discussion about "who is a real man" and "who is a
real woman".
So here, to
continue with our discussion, we are raising the question of how
might a real man and a real woman be defined?
From a
cultural perspectives we don't expect to have names of famous
figures mentioned, but we would like everybody to come up with a
definition of a real man and a real woman based
on your own personal and/or cultural perspectives.
For
instance, what might the definitions be based on Arab culture?
Real MAN
A Woman's Fantasy
A very special person she is looking for;
A person who scarcely existed before.
This is her great long-sought goal,
To find the missing part of her soul.
She is seeking a creature who is fair,
Honest, loyal, and handles her with care.
Compassionate and patient when her heart bleeds of sorrow,
Strong and reliable when she is weak and afraid as a sparrow.
She is seeking someone whom she can believe,
Someone who will not give up and leave,
After their first stormy childish fight,
Someone who will search with her for light.
She is seeking someone dignified and proud,
Yet his nobleness melts modestly in the crowd,
Someone whose wisdom overwhelms her mind,
But in matters of the heart, he is giving and kind.
She is not looking for luxury, charm, or perfection.
She is looking for one who can give her true affection.
Someone who’s trustworthy and virtuous,
someone who’s devoted and gracious.
An angel this person is not,
His defects are, in fact, a lot,
But she can handle his imperfections,
As long as love dominates his affections.
Sadly, her search will end in despair,
And she will be bitterly obliged to declare,
That after searching everywhere, she had a shock,
Because she discovered that a true man is out of stock!
Wednesday, July 4, 2002
By Maha
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--About
those who want Muslim women to take their minds out of gutters of
the west and try to persuade them that polygyny is a sign of
respect to women because the number of single women has climbed so
high , and those who asked Muslim women not to condemn single
women if they marry any woman’s husband because they have married
rather than commit a sin . I want to ask them does our religion
won’t be completed if we don’t marry? Do we do everything in our
religion except marrying ??
If everyman marry four or three or even two wives the problem of
single women won’t be solved and we will find many other problems
between the wives and their children and at the end the husband
will die or he will be bedlam {Mad}
At the end I
think that everyman should marry one woman and the man who marry
more than one will lose everything at the end and he should bear
what will happen to him from his first WIFE !!!!!!!!!!!!!
--In
Saudi Arabia, many people now call for polygamy since they believe
it helps to solve the problem of unmarried women who might have
lost the hope of being mothers for any reason.
----
The Islamic
conditions of Polygamy:
1- Justice
in dealing with the wives which includes being fair in financial
matters, gifts, trips, entertainment, buying a house, furniture,
car, health care …etc.
2- Justice
in treatment which means treating both or (all) wives kindly and
not treating one wife kindly at the expense of the other.
3- Justice
in treating and raising children.
4- Justice
in the sexual relation.
5-
Not abandoning
one wife for the other.
6- Not
making comparisons between the wives, which might hurt their
feelings and make them carry hate and grudge for each others
(those feelings are not encouraged or approved to occur between
Muslims).
7-
Establishing a
separate house for each wife according to her taste and standards.
8-
Dealing with
every wife according to her personality and needs.
--I am new to this idea of polygamy/polygyny as monogamy is the
law here in the
USA. However thinking back on how
all my relatives lived, at least by this notion, they would have
been telling the truth. In fact, thinking back most of the
divorces were a result denied freedom, over control, jealosy,
suspicions.... all of which are not fair by all means to anyone.
Some couples even stay married
for the sake of the children, sometimes in cold emotionless
relationships. Both living miserably for years and years just for
the sake of upholding their vows to look good in others eyes and
as they say "keeping up appearances"… What is the point of
such behaviors I have always wondered. The mentality is to stay
together and struggle through life's problems... but what is the
answer is to go separate ways... if only for a while...
In
such a cases, all suffer as reality is not being accepted, and the
parents oftentimes fight for affections of the children... with or
without divorce. In the worst case scenarios, it is domestic
violence. The man/woman stays with the abusive spouse, only
because there is a fear of leaving or being alone, oftentimes
accepting a dramatic relationship as alright and acceptable...
Aren't marriages supposed to
encourage open dialogue and honesty? I wonder is merely making
someone feel bad in the moment worth all these emotional struggles
and all the efforts to save face for the sake of living a lie...
I
will say that my parents were divorced when I was very young and
really I think that was the best thing that happened to both of
them. Sure it was sad and not ideal in the way of the world, but
really they were not suitable for living with each other at all
and quite frankly speaking they grew apart. I will also add that
it did not negatively impact me at all; in fact it gave me a
different perspective on things and actually helped me learn how
to deal with conflicts in a much healthier way. I know there is
the notion of the broken home but from experience that is not true
at all, it is only society's outrageous demands that makes it into
this.
-----
--the
main role of the mother is to play the role of the mother and the
wife together.. she should not work unless there is a nessecity
for it.. the work should not be degrading or so hard. Also it
should not take all her time because this will lead to the same
problem .." day cares" !!
I think that the issue of
"women's work" in western society is not the same in Arab one..
when I am talking about the Arab women I know what I am talking
about cause I live the same circumstances and conditions.. I know
what she needs and how she feels . actually Liza I want u to give
us ur opinion and tell us the conditions the western women live ..
why they work?? what r their needs?? to them, what is the meaning
of the "family" ???
--I agree
Cinderella, the context of the issue of women’s work is different
in the Arab world than it is in the USA. However, in some ways,
historically there are some similarities. Years ago in the USA,
women’s work was something that was rare and most likely was a
result of class, marital status or needed at time of war. The
notion a very strong and assertive woman who spoke her mind tended
to occur in the face of a “male dominated” society, which can
account for the many different types of feminist movements and
“fights” for women’s rights.
--In the
USA, the culture is based more on materialism so the wife would be
responsible for keeping up appearances or as they say “keeping up
with the Jones” (if one neighbor has something the other neighbor
must get something bigger and better). Any deviation from these
traditional gender roles would have been seen as vulgar and
socially unacceptable behavior. Although it is not fair to
generalize when it comes to family life, which is specific to
one’s own experience and perception of those experiences. These
are just a brief outline some of the major issues of women’s work
and role in the context of western society. If you have any
additional questions or want to know more about specific dates,
etc. please do ask. To continue with the idea of family and women
working…
---------
--
In Egypt , we buy our fruits and vegetables by kilos to the whole
family , some ladies go to the market weekly and buy all what they
need so they buy many kilos of fruits and vegetables On the
other hand , the American or European buy their vegetables by
one according to the number of their families
--And
now we can say that every country has its ways of life which
differ from others , and the customs are different according to
the different environment and according to people who live there ,
we also should notice that it’s difficult to transfer culture
from country to another because it
will die because of the different circumstances .
--have
been reading about Muslims and Islamic culture and figures. I
have read about Omar Bin Al-Khatab, and I liked his way of ruling
the Muslim world as he was a fair leader. Today I read about Al-Hajjaj
Bin Yousiff Al-Thgaffi. I found a major contrast between Omar and
Al-Hajjaj. I found his personality to be very interesting. In
one instance, he addressed all the Iraqis with a strong speech and
then he made many jokes with them. Here is one I would like to
share with you.
The
Mad Man
Al-Hajjaj persecuted people everywhere. The people in the deserts
were afraid of his name.
One day, al-Hajjaj went to a desert. He found a man there.
He
said to the man: What do
you think about al-Hajjaj?
The man said: He's unjust!
Al-Hajjaj said: What do you
think about Caliph Abid al-Malik bin Marwan?
The man said: He's more
unjust than him!
Al-Hajjaj said: Do you know
me?
The man said: No, I don't!
Who are you?
Al-Hajjaj said: I'm al-Hajjaj.
The man shook with fear and said:
Your Highness, the Prince, do you
know me?
Al-Hajjaj said: No! Who are
you?
The man said with fear: One
of the Bani Thour. I get crazy twice a year! This is one of them!
Al-Hajjaj smiled and let the man go.
The man pretended madness. So, al-Hajjaj let him go.
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